I have to admit that I am a person who is weak and always run away from everything and everyone.It's hard for me to admit how much I love something and someone.
It is always easier to just run away in order not to be hurted again.
After days, years and moments of hope, expectation, desire and breaking heart, I know one truth:
No expectation, there will be no hurting and no breaking heart.
Sadly to know, as a human being, I am a person who is full of emotion, caring and love.
And I know in the end, I will be hurted again and again after all.
But how can we stop loving something and someone if we are in love?
I always want to run away and choose the way to abandon everything.
In the end, I found out it's the easiest way to just abandon myself and terminate everything.
It is always simple to stop everything alone quietly and silently myself.
No troubles to you and to everyone.
Why I am so sad and having a breaking heart on everything?
The world and you should be the perfect one, aren't you?
Cause I love everything and everyone too much?
I don't know. Or I am just the selfish one?
I only know that endless suffering and loneliness will be with me until I die.
I know no matter how much I love you, everyone and everything, I have to face and go through my journey myself alone.
If the moment comes, and I still will have you, the one, who still care, love and put me in your mind and palms.
Then, I am the lucky one.
I hope one day you will help and free my soul. Are you the one?
I know one truth, no expectation and no sorrow; no craving and no dissatisfaction.
But why am I still so sad?
Cause I have everything now and I know that I will loose all of them very soon.
Live is just a dream.
I don't know how much I can devote myself to the world, to the people or to you?
What can I do for you with selfless purpose? Only for you ...
When can I stop running away from everything, you and myself.
I am afraid of the future, unknown and breaking heart.
I am just still the little girl who cries in the corner of the room.
If I have no heart, maybe it is easier and maybe I won't be hurted by anything anymore!
It's about time to run away~
Why I am still crying alone again?
